Elijah Now

“Hi, my name is Richie and I’m an imperfect parent.”

(This is your part where you either say, “Hi Richie.” Or you hit the “unsubscribe button at the bottom of this email)

 For those of you who are still reading let me explain. I’m parenting for the first time – every day. Each day brings new challenges and adventures. I have never passed this way before, so it’s all new all the time. And I regularly muff it. In fact sometimes I really blow it. I’m growing, I’m working at doing better in my weak spots, but it’s a process and I mess up along the way.

 However, I am learning that a mistake doesn’t have to end in disaster. If I am willing to swallow my pride and go to my child in humble confession, amazing things happen. It looks different based on the situation, but here’s how I understand it. If I accidentally step on their project and break it I say, “Oops! I’m sorry I didn’t see that there.” But if I really blow it and do or say something hurtful different rules apply. Then I go to my child (or who ever) and say, “I hurt you. My words or actions were wrong. That’s not the person I want to be. Will you forgive me?” That last sentence is key. When I do something hurtful I need to ask for forgiveness.

It’s not easy, but an amazing thing happens, without fail, every time I do this with my boys. A hurt heart softens towards daddy. There is forgiveness which restores our relationship. And then, without any prompting on my part, there is confession from my child. When I model responsibility and repentance my child follows my lead – every time. The conversations we have after I confess my failure as a dad are usually the most powerful interactions between us.

 Do you struggle, like me, to admit you’ve made mistakes? Then dabble in the powerful art of Apology. You’ll be amazed at what happens when you do.